Uncle Sam, We did Our Chores, Why can't We have Our Allowance?

I just got done reading an article posted on armytimes.com today about the impending government shutdown and the possibility of not receiving pay in mid-October*; and two things immediately happened. First, I started the momentary freak out in the back of my head wondering how the hell we are going to survive not getting paid**. After about thirty seconds, I calmed down and started running through a list in my head. The sad thing is that since this is not the first time we've dealt with this issue, the list is already there. It's already been created. The problem is this is the first time we've been solely dependent on the Army for our paychecks when this list has been put into play. And yes I do mean "our pay." SGT Hubs may be the one working, but I am the one paying the bills, managing the homefront and feeding our monsters on a day-to-day basis.

What's frightening to me is that half of the list running through my head, I wasn't even aware I was doing. I started thinking about the conversation SGT Hubs and I would need to have this evening as I walked through the house shutting off lights left on by the monsters. I knew I was shutting the lights off, which should be a habit anyway. But in our tiny apartment, we usually leave the lights on as there are so few windows to bring light from outside. But subconsciously I was thinking about dropping the electric bill as low as possible. I started double checking to make sure I had supplies already on had to make my homemade cleaning supplies. I was debating if I have enough ink in the printer for coupons to save money on groceries. These are all things I try to do anyway but not as a rule. It's a "when I remember" thing, not a "because I have to since there might not be any money" thing. And then begin the questions. The questions I wish I could ask the people responsible for the near fear I am experiencing right now. So here is an open letter to Congress that I wish they could read.

Dear Congress,

Why? Why are we the ones to suffer? Yes, my husband and I did know what we were getting into when he signed on the dotted line. We talked long and hard about the possibilities of what lay ahead when he decided to reenlist. Not being paid wasn't one of them. Yes, we knew he would be deployed and multiple times. I haven't complained about that. Am I happy about it? No. Have I whined about him not being home to help? Yes. But I accept it. I know it's his job. But it's your job to compensate him and the thousands of other men and women who gave up their freedom to protect this country.

What I don't understand is that when faced with the reality of a budget change, I can handle it better. I shut lights off, cut coupons, and say no to the angelic faces begging me for a Happy Meal. What's wrong with you that you can't learn from that? Have you forgotten how to do those things? In all likelihood you never had to worry about such things in your lives. Ever. And if you did, you obviously aren't yelling loud enough for you counterparts to hear. Or maybe that's the problem. There's too much yelling and not enough listening. We have that problem in our house too. But I am also teaching the monsters that it's important to take turns talking and listening to other people. Sounds like you need to find your listening ears. The ones you have on are obviously not working.

I've said it before and I'll say it again. Put a bunch of E4, E5, even E6 wives in charge of your budget and we'll get you straightened out. We are used to stretching that almighty dollar to cover food, bills, daycare/preschool, soccer/football/horseback riding lessons, and the all too frequent "Mom, my shoes are too tight again!" I expect there to be whining on your part. I expect complaining. I expect not everyone to be happy with the outcome. But you know what? After living the monsters for the last almost five and nine years respectively (I said almost, it gets the point across), I really don't think you can top the whine/scream/ear-piercing decibel level that is a cranky, overtired four year old not getting his way and hearing mom say a very firm, for the fifth and final time, "No." I'm pretty good at tuning that out. You might even say ignoring it.

So, Congress, this is Mom talking. That's Mom with a capital M to you, by the way. I'm giving you one last chance to get this budget issue squared away. And I swear if you don't, I will come out there to DC and give you ground you all. And it won't be the military and their families worrying about how they are going to put food on the table and pay the bills. And if you're lucky I might just bring my "We WILL get along!" shirt.

Sincerely yours,
Mom, HH6 of this household

 

*According to the article we will receive our pay eventually, when Congress fixes the budget issue. I hate that word. Eventually does not take care of our bills. I feel Congress should be responsible for calling our creditors, leasing office, utility companies, etc. and explain to them why they may be receiving their payments late from us.

 

**I suggest my fellow Military Spouses check out this link on ways to make the possible temporary loss of pay a little easier. A little. It's better than nothing.

The Return of Darth Samius

So as if my life isn't crazy enough, I took The Captain to the doc today to find out he has croup, again. Poor kid can't catch a break. For that matter, poor mom can't catch a break either, as this was our second trip to the peds this week, our third in two weeks, and we'll be back there next week (most of the trips have been for Apprentice though.) On top of already not feeling well, The Captain had two separate meltdowns thanks to hating anything being put in his ears. So I got to hold down a screaming monster in the middle of the hallway to get his temp taken and then again so the doc could look in his ears. She was very impressed by my strength and quickness however. I hate forcing him to sit through anything that goes against his SPD but knew we needed an accurate temp since every time I checked him at home he was running a low-grade fever. But honestly it breaks my heart listening to him screaming that it hurts his ears. It reminds me that while he's come a long way, he still has so far to go. Fortunately for all involved, the doc was able to figure things out pretty quick and we got out of there asap. I did try to make up for things by taking him to Costco, where we were able to procure ourselves some yummy samples. That made everyone all smiles again. In the meantime, I wonder if I can one of the docs at the peds office to prescribe me a very large bottle of wine to make everything all better?

The Return of Darth Samius

Tales of a Big Yellow Chicken Named....Mom

I don't like creepy crawlies. It's a well known fact. Bugs, spiders, snakes...*massive shudder*...we just don't get along. So I went into the monsters' room shortly ago to check on them and turn their fan back on, (I thought it was supposed to cool down after the storms!) and a large black spot caught my eye. Now I swear up and down I saw this thing move, which is probably why it stood out from everything else on their floor. I leaned in for a closer look and saw legs.



First glance, is it moving?

Fortunately for the monsters, I did NOT scream at the top of my lungs and run from the room. I took a deep breath, turned on the flashlight on my phone (thank god there's an app for that!) and poked at it with a long Lego. It did not scream and run away either. Turns out it was a plastic spider one of them had gotten at some point. Yeah, I think that will be disappearing the next time I clean out their toys.



Up close and personal, look at that plastic sheen.

Pardon me while I slink away in embarrassment now...

First Days of School, AKA Mommy's Free!

Apprentice started first this year, heading into third grade. He's pretty excited (though he won't openly admit it.) This year marks a major step forward for him as he was accepted to the district gifted program. Way to go kid!



 

So after having all the teachers comment at the school open house comment on how much Apprentice had grown, I decided to compare last year's first day picture to this year's first day picture. I guess he really has grown.

 

The following week, The Captain started at his new preschool. This is another major step forward for one of my monsters. While therapy has been going well for The Captain, every other week is just not enough for the poor kid. My only current frustration is that he decided to behave the day of his evaluation. So he while he was accepted to the preschool, he is there as a typical kid as opposed to an exceptional kid. Here's hoping the "honeymoon period" wears off quickly. He does like his new teacher, Miss Maria, very much.

Both monsters seem to be doing well so far. Mom, meanwhile, is quite enjoying her freedom.

Is that "Catch up" or "Ketchup"?

So as you might be able to guess, it's been little hectic around here this summer. But with both monsters in school, I am hoping to finally get back to sharing our fun little moments. So bear with me while I continue to play catch up here. I am also hoping to post some realtime posts in between. Enjoy!

Adventures in the Sandbox

Eight weeks ago I was cleaning our living room in preparation for a home visit from the preschool we have been hoping to get the Captain into when my phone rang. What followed, as well as the moments leading up to that point, will forever be etched in my memory . It was SGT Hubby calling from WLC. Normally this would have not been strange, except for the fact that in the week that he had been away so far, he had only been calling at night to say goodnight to the Monsters and I before bed. This call came midmorning.

 

SGT Hubby: I just got a phone call...

 

I immediately started thinking he had finally heard about a fulltime guard position we had been waiting to hear about since December (which we found out later he had not gotten).

 

SGT Hubby: ...from the Commander.

 

Me: What's wrong?

 

He then proceeded to tell me that he was possibly being deployed but it wasn't a for sure thing yet.

Well, here we are eight weeks later, and we are at the start of our second deployment.

 

It's been a whirlwind romance. In the eight weeks between the original phone call and today, I saw SGT Hubby nineteen days out of fifty-six days. We tried to pack as much as we could in the days we had him, but between him working his civilian job still and the Apprentice still being in school, the time passed far too quickly. I also do not feel as though reality has set in yet.

 

With our first deployment, we knew over a year in advance that he would be leaving. It loomed over our heads through all the holidays and birthdays we had prior to him leaving. This time around we were able to enjoy those holidays blissfully unaware of the trainwreck what the future held for us. But the lack of time to prepare can be just as bad. It's only the first day in and I am discovering things that we overlooked in our preparations. That is the nature of deployment and more things will surface. And we will overcome them. Because we are strong. We have to be.

You Know You're A Geek Parent When...

...you yell things like "No thermal detonaters in the house!" or "That's not how we hold a lightsaber!" as your kids run past you.

Your son was seduced by the Dark Side of the Force

He ceased to be Padawan Nic and became Darth Nicorus. (Points for you if you recognize the Episode VI reference.)

Ok well that's not actually what we call him. But out of respect of my child I am acknowledging that he no longer wishes to referred to as Padawan. He is adamant that he is a Sith now and forever. So hence forth he will be referred to as Apprenctice. For those unfamiliar with the ways of the Dark Side...well...I can't really help you there. You'll have to ask him. I am a Jedi to the end. Except when I'm a Smuggler. But that's a different story.

When Daddy's away, the Children will play

Daddy's away at drill this weekend. And of course the weather is sunny but still not warm enough to play outside. So since everyone (including Mom) was going stir crazy, I decided to take advantage of the opportunity of a free weekend. I packed the monsters into the car and off to one of our favorite indoor spots we went: Sylvania Playland. We don't go very often because, while it's not very expensive, it's not super cheap either. And it makes the day more special. Today was one of those special days.

 

It was ridiculously busy today. So I didn't get much in the way of pictures of the monsters playing in the indoor playground. But the Captain got some fabulous sensory input.

 

 

Next up we decided to check out the new glow golfing area. Apprentice showed off his mad golfing skills with a hole in one. 



 

The Captain is still working to perfect his skills. Though I did recently learn that golf is a good activity for him to participate for sensory input.

 

 

All smiles for Mom.

The Apprentice took this one of me. (Note the dragons, my favorite.)

 

 

We also spent some time in their arcade. The monsters went nuts over the air hockey table.



 

 

After some dinner and errands post playtime, we decided a night in a fort was needed to finish the day off. Here's hoping they stay put for the night.

 

 

Year at a Glance: July 4, 2012

We took the boys downtown for fireworks with our friends, Miss Alyssa and Mr. Aaron. After a brief rainshower we settled in.

 

The Captain and his Alyssa (watch out Mr. Aaron!):

 

Group shot minus Sergeant (who's manning the camera):

Ear plugs -- check:

Family shot (Padawan's starting to get bored waiting):

 

The Captain fell asleep before the show started and slept through most of it):

Playing with the fireworks setting on my camera got me some pretty cool looking shots:

 

The next evening we played with sparklers. The boys thoroughly enjoyed themselves.

 

Year at a Glance: July 2012

Playing at Mimi & Papa's house:

 

Puddle jumping (always a favorite pastime):

 

Trying to help big brother with his loose teeth:

 

The Captain: Our Sensational Kid

The past few months have been very busy for us so I haven't been able to keep up on here as I would have hoped to. I plan to catch up on things now that the major headache holiday season is finally (for now) over for us. But there is one post that I have been mulling over how to get through share with everyone and explains a little of why we have been so busy as a family and may also explain a few of my facebook posting over the last few months.

As many of you know, Sergeant and I decided to put The Captain into preschool this school year. It was a majorly discussed decision as we had kept Padawan home with us until Kindergarten. But while Padawan was antisocial perfectly happy being home playing on his own, The Captain is much more social and truly enjoys being around other children. We figured he would settle in happily and enjoy being at school. The second part was true. The first part, not so much. He really does enjoy his preschool and would love it even more if it was fulltime and not just two days a week for a few hours. However, he was having trouble adjusting. I came to dread picking him up and judging how the day went by his beloved teacher's face. More days than not I knew right away it had not been a good day.

Now it was not a case of him being naughty or anything along those lines. It was simple things. He refused to sing during prayer circle/song time. He was all over the room during freeplay, bulldozing over the other kids. He couldn't sit still and finish his snack. The teachers would have to take turns pulling him off of whatever latest piece of furniture he was scaling. And he was hitting his classmates, though never maliciously. The last had me down right mortified. I couldn't stand the thought of the other parents thinking my kid was this horrible, monstrous bully. He's so sweet and loving. Yes he can be rambunctious. But he's never been one to purposely hurt another person, except maybe Padawan.

By November, just after his fourth birthday, the Captain's teacher decided it was time to really have a talk about what was going on. She agreed that he wasn't a bad kid. But maybe there was something more going on. He just wasn't adjusting the way the other kids were. She said it was almost as though he was a two year old in a four year old body. Fortunately his four year well check was a week later.

I fretted. I cried. What was wrong? Was there something I had missed? Sergeant and I had always just written it off as he was just a daredevil. Afraid of nothing in life. Full of energy. A true boy at heart. And the complete opposite of Padawan. We joke when he grows up he'll be a Special Forces Trauma Surgeon who jumps out of airplanes to relax. But I kept coming to what was wrong with me as a mother that I had missed that something was wrong with my baby? I started to really think about how the first four years with him had been. By the time his appointment with our favorite doc rolled around I was an emotional wreck, though I like to think I held it together on the outside pretty well.

At the wellcheck we went through the usual routine, answering the same questions I answer every year for the boys. The nurse asked if there was anything I wished to discuss with the doc, any questions or concerns. I replied yes that some things had come up at preschool. When the doc came in The Captain sat still for the regular exam, but as soon as he was released and I started going over everything his teacher and I had discussed, he showed his true colors.

Scamper up on the exam table. Crawl across the table. Leap into mom's arms. Jump down to the floor. Run across the room. Scamper up on the exam table. Crawl across the table. Leap into mom's arms. Jump down to the floor. Run across room. Scamper up on the exam table. Rinse. Lather. Repeat.

"This is every single day of the last four years, Doc."

"Let's get him into the therapy." And he hands me a prescription with the magical words that answered my every question: Sensory Processing Disorder.

When I got home and began Googling and researching, everything began to click into place. Why he hits (undersensitive to touch.) Why he hates loud noises (oversensitive to sound.) Why he has meltdowns over the weirdest things (truly just overstimulated and not knowing how to handle his body in those situations.) Answers to everything. The easiest way to drescribe it is that his brain doesn't know how to process his senses the way a "normal" child's brain does. We all have SPD to an extent. I can't stand tags in my clothes and certain types of fabric. Padawan and Sergeant do not handle transition well. The Captain just has it worse than the rest of us.

We're still learning. We're still waiting for an opening at the Rehab center we were recommended to take him to for Occupational Therapy. But we have little things we have been doing with him to make life easier. We try to do more sensory play at home. I'm working to make him a weighted blanket. His monkey leash has become his favorite tool, working as a pressure vest until we can obtain a real one. Anytime people comment on it (mostly good comments about how much they like his monkey) he tells them that his friend monkey "helps him calm down" or "helps him be good." His teachers have said over and over that between Monkey and a weighted snake at school, he is a completely different child.

It's been a roller coaster few months and yet so amazing. We are all learning to look at The Captain differentand see the world as he sees it. He still has meltdowns. He's still our little wild child. And I wouldn't change him for the world.

The Captain and his beloved Mrs. K